How do you communicate your needs to your family, partner, colleagues, or employer? Often, we want others to read our minds and automatically know what we need. However, this is an unrealistic expectation. I frequently hear, “My partner should know me by now,” but the reality is that we don’t fully get to know someone. We are constantly changing; thus, our needs change as well. Communicating your needs should not be difficult. Have conversations when your needs are not being met. For example, if you are feeling overwhelmed in your relationship, have a conversation with your partner and communicate what you need from them to help. Allow your partner to ask questions for clarification without getting defensive, and answer them honestly.
Here are some tips for effective communication:
| Active listening | Establish boundaries |
| Compromise regularly | Ask questions |
| Check your feelings | Show respect |
| Observe non-verbal signs | Avoid criticism |
| Open body language | Avoid making assumptions |
| Respond rather than react | Be aware of your tone |
| Do not interrupt unless absolutely necessary |
- Rosa Schuff - ACSW